Monday, February 28, 2011

My job

So, I am a teacher and I love my students, so I thought I would share them with you. I took a pictures of their toesies because that is the only legal thing I can show you where I can't get in trouble.

These are the kids that:
keep me on MY toes
make me laugh
make me say things I never would have thought I would ever have to say
remind me daily of why I do what I do

Thanks kiddos for helping to make me feel worthwhile!!!

Thursday, February 24, 2011

I'm back!!!

Well February has been one heck of a month...but I am back and with a vengeance. This month has tested my positivity and joyfulness. I have missed 8 days of work in this short month with tooth trouble and catching the glorious flu. Hopefully my ill felt days are so over! I have spent the past 4 days cuddled up in my cozy feather bed nestled in tight with my furry, fuzzy dog and cat. Going back to work is going to be such a drag. I thought I was bored there for a few days....Now that I went up to work to get a few things so I can plan my next week, I realized that life of sleeping around was a life of luxury. :)

I am in this Bible study right now where we are talking about being women of godly character--being full of joy and contentment. We have talked about how women tend to seem "fearful" to get their way with men...not just our husbands but any man we are around. How we use manipulation to get our way. Now most people I know can attest to the fact that I am the QUEEN of manipulation. I use my persuasive ways on anyone...and I mean anyone...I come in contact with. It isn't something I am proud of but it is the simple truth. I tried really hard while I was lying in bed to not be needlessly needy or manipulative...but its soooo hard. I do have to say that my husband made it super easy for me to not have to use my "powers of persuasion." He did everything he could for me when he was home from scratching and rubbing my aching back, to refilling my drink tab, to going to the store to get me whatever soup I fancied. As I tried to be more mindful of my manipulative ways, I realized this is something I really should work on and improve.

We also talked about how critical we can be....well I am the QUEEN of criticism (especially with my husband). The poor man can't do anything right. I have all the right answers, the right ways things should be done. I have control over all situations...I am the person in the family who makes this family stay afloat. Well, first off, so not true to any of that. God create in me some humility (which I am also lacking in). I do have all the answers. Just maybe not all the right ones. I do like to have control over all situations, but I need to give it up to God. Here is one example of my criticism: Curtis was driving (really enough should be said right there), and we were in the parking lot (again, enough said). He takes like 15 minutes to drive through a parking lot and find a spot when we already passed one or two or three...(you catch my drift) until FINALLY he finds one....oh yea...and it is further away than the one, two, three, etc I found! I am always making snide remarks under my breath or out loud about it....and that is just one out of thousands of ways I am constantly critical of my husband when all he wants and needs from me is a little R.E.S.P.E.C.T.

So, here are the things I am going to make more of an effort to work on: being respectful to my husband instead of critical and being a women of godly character. I want to find joy and contentment in all that I do. I also need to learn some humility. So here is to a new day, a day that God has given me where He can support me in my efforts to be more of the kind of woman He created me to be in the first place. One He will be proud of, one that will make my husband happier and one that will make me more accomplished in the eyes of my heavenly Father!

Tuesday, February 8, 2011


I am so blessed. I am reminded of that almost every day, yet don't really thank God for it. God has blessed me and my family with good health, not many financial burdens, a roof over my head and my family's, food on my table, a job, a church that teaches me and helps me grow, love from people around me, a life to live, among so many other things.

But why is it that I am reminded of this fact most when hardship comes to a friend? I have a friend from one of the schools I have worked at who's mom passed away last night. This friend has so many things to deal with in life already and now she has to deal with the death of her mother. Why is it that some people have one thing after another they have to muddle through? Why am I fortunate enough to not?

It is so hard to understand. I know God loves her and she loves God. Why has she been dealt that hand and I haven't? Things in life just don't make sense. I am hurting for this person. Every time she turns around she gets more news of something that would be for most people very difficult to deal with. Every time she turns around it is like she gets another slap in the face. I am proud of her, though. God has given her a strength I don't think I would have. God has shown me through her that He can help you handle and deal with all problems.

Maybe that is why I have not been dealt the cards she has. Maybe I am not strong enough to make it. I pray that my friend will be given more strength from God and those who surround her at this time to deal with the loss of her mother. Losing a mother has got to be a very hard thing to deal is something I truly fear because I love my mother so (and my dad! :)).
I pray that she will find peace and know that her mother is in a safer, pain free place. A place we all get to join back together in one day!

In these times of trouble, I am reminded of my blessings. I am thankful for how easy God has made my life seem. I feel it is selfish, but I continue to pray for these blessings to continue to flow, but I pray that God will send some pain free days to my friend.

Father, God, thank you for all things You have provided. Thank you for the house You provided for Curtis and I. Thank you for the jobs we have to help us earn some money so we can pay for the things we need and also for allowing us to have things we don't need. Father, thank you for my family who have been my constant support system and have shown me unconditional love. Thank you for my mom and dad who have shown me how to love others and how to love and serve and know God. Thank you for my parents who encouraged me and held me accountable for being a person He would be proud of. Thank you for my brother and sister for always looking out for me and taking care of me. I am truly blessed and I pray Father that I can be a blessing to all those I come in contact with. :)

Sunday, February 6, 2011

building a legacy

I was honored to be able to attend a beautiful funeral where we looked at the dear woman who passed and how she was finally home with her Maker.

The funeral was beautiful. The things that were said were so true and meaningful. Margaret Slater was a great woman. I have known her much of my life and was truly blessed by her example. She was like another grandmother to me.

She loved her family and she loved God. She did everything to honor Him and to bless her family. It is no doubt that right now, she is with our Father, hugging on Him and He is smiling from ear to ear to have her there with Him.

Those of us that loved her can have peace knowing that is what is happening.

She was so proud of her family and those close to her. She loved her 8 grandchildren and thought her own children hung the moon. They are truly a magnificent family who all love God and honor Him in their daily living. Their an inspiration to us all...and Margaret help to build that legacy. She was an accomplished woman. Maybe not in the eyes of those who think money and grandeur are what shows that a person is accomplished. But in the eyes of those who know what truly matters, Margaret was rich! She has three children who love God with all their hearts and serve Him. They have all raised or are raising children who love and serve God too. That is true accomplishment.

I know she will be missed by many. Her husband Paul who I adore, misses her, but knows that she is with her heavenly Father.

Margaret, thank you for the inspiration you were to all of us and for building the legacy you have built. Thank you for showing me what true accomplishment is. I hope that I can be an accomplished woman so I can see you again someday with our Maker.

another day...

Well it has been another day of pain....

The tooth surgery went well on Tuesday but recovering has been anything but easy and relaxing. Everyone says to just take it easy...well when you have pulsating pain throbbing in your mouth and moving on up to your ear, then that sparks a headache and to top it off, any medicine you take makes you throw up or constantly feel as if you need to but cant, makes you sweat bullets and many other gets hard to take things easy. Even sitting on the couch watching a movie can seem daunting.

Thankfully, I have a great set of parents who watched over me when Curtis couldn't and a husband who waits on me hand and foot when he is around.

It is Sunday. I have been out of work since Tuesday. Here I thought I would be back to work on Wednesday, or Thursday at the very latest. I was going to go in Friday but then the substitute said she could sub for me again and I totally took her up on that. The thought of being able to stay home one more day and know that my kids would be taken care of was such a good thought. Friday, I felt like I was coming around. I still had pain and have been told it is dry socket. Well dry socket bites. Then I went to a funeral on Saturday for a dear friend who passed. I was nauseous most of the morning but it was important to me that I make it to this funeral (which was beautiful). Ever since then, I have basically felt like a waste of space.

This is the first time in days I have been able to sit at the computer for more than 5 minutes and not want to throw up or begin sweating bullets.

Needless to say, I don't feel like I am doing very good on the whole positivity thing I was working on. I have been down and out. I mean I just said I feel like a waste of space, which I am sure God would not be pleased with me feeling that way. Please, Father bring me out of this. I have so much going on this week and can't miss a thing. Give me the good health to be able to do the things that have to get done and to be the person You have made me to be.